-Attraction increases if we have like characteristics, values, attitudes, interests, and personality traits with another person.

-You may also be attracted more to persons who are similar to you in age, intelligence, and life goals.

-In the initial stages of a relationship, we try to emphasize positive information about ourselves to create a positive and attractive image. We reveal those aspects of ourselves that we believe we have in common with the other person, and the other person does the same.

o Physical and Sexual Attraction

Physical: this form of attraction relates to finding another person’s physical self-appealing.

-That appeal may be based on height, size, skin tone and texture, clothing, hairstyle, makeup, vocal qualities, gestures, and so forth.

Sexual: this form involves the desire to have sexual contact with a certain person

-You may be physically attracted to someone but not sexually attracted.

-Each culture teaches and perpetuates its own definition of physical ideal.

-Our perceptions about others’ physical attractiveness reduces relationship possibilities. This means that, in general, while we may be attracted to arrange of persons, we tend to seek out individuals who represent the same level of physical attractiveness as ourselves. This is termed the matching hypothesis.

o Proximity

-We are more likely to be inter personally attracted to people who are physically close to us rather than farther away.

-physical proximity increases communication opportunities.

o Complimentary

-We may be attracted to persons with abilities, interests, and needs that differ from our own but that balance or round out our own.

Example: if you are highly disorganized by nature (and that is fine by you), you might be attracted to someone who is very organized because you appreciate that person’s sense of structure.

Social psychologist Will Schutz identified three interpersonal needs that motivate us to form and maintain relationships with others: inclusion, control, and affection.

inclusion: represents the need to include others in our activities or to be included in theirs.

control: represents the need to make decisions and take responsibility or the level of willingness to accept others’ decision making.

Affection: represents the need to be loved and accepted by others or the willingness to give love and acceptance to others.

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